BROKEN

This is what I wrote after the experience that fateful morning of September 15, 2023...

I'm up...GM...my heart is broken. 

How good God is, is the deep depths of evil that man can go. 

I woke up and thought about Emmett Till and just realizing as I type this, he went to a "foreign land"-- the Mississippi South -- and came back in a box from the actions of evil man who felt justified by their grotesque act to brutally murder an innocent young man.

The showcasing of the act was the catalyst for the civil rights movements.

Racial injustice could not be ignored by anyone.

One of the comments mentioned Exodus 34:6-7.

I expanded the reading to verses 5-10 and realized, this is on the hill of Moses breaking the first tablets in anger at the sight of the people acting a nut, depraved, ungrateful, engaging in sinful decadence AFTER God split the Red Sea (THE RED SEA!!! The max depth is 9974 ft, 40% has places shallower than 330 ft (100 meters) with 25% places less than 164 ft (50 meters) deep!!!) to save them from Egypt's slavery and captivity. 

My gosh, it broke my heart 'cuz God, IN SPITE of the unrepentant and defiant ways of the people (just like the evil Emmett Till murderers), God descended in the clouds to stand with Moses and proclaimed His own Name (verse 5) and tells us His loving-kindness is for 1000's and he forgives iniquity, transgressions, and sin, but does not leave the guilty unpunished, even revisiting the iniquity to generations (v. 6-7).

Moses gets on the good foot knowing how unworthy he is and the trifling people partying like hooligans and he bows and worships God. I see him in my mind laying down with his nose touching the ground waving His arms around to worship to get as low as he could to show how lowly he is in God's presence! That had to be a long worship session...he had to feel compelled to have a long praise party after God just broke down Who He is and what He was going to do. Ain't no way God dropped the mic and Moses give a 5-minute praise. It had to be a while of worshiping 'cuz Moses asks if God NOW finds favor in him, to please forgive the stiff-neck and their iniquity AND take them/claim them as His possession/inheritance. Wow...that is pretty bold of a request to ask on behalf of some gold-melting-calf-graven-imaging-molding folk. Who would want these people to represent anyone, let alone our God and who would want to leave ANYTHING to them???

And then, v. 10. God said He would make a covenant with them. 😳 Huh?!?! WHAT???? God says He would perform miracles that have never been seen on the earth nor among the nations*. That struck me 'cuz I am like (1) God forgives just like that, (2) NOT only does God forgive GROTESQUE sin (just like the evil men that murder Emmett Till), but will accept these same obstinate people AS HIS POSSESSION, (3) Wow, even back then, God let's us know about the concept of Earth and presumably the solar system AND even different nations existing on the earth! (4) God is going to display what He can do to even the people who know us so they undoubtedly know it is God doing it, (5) These things are going to be so Big, so fearfully done, so terrible of a shake-up, so unheard of, so majestic, so we all will know it was God who did these things, & (6) God will perform these things with us. Lowly you and I will get to bare witness and assist with the High things God is doing. Again, the picture flashed before me in my mind of all of the people wrapped around the block to attend and see Emmett Till at his funeral. The world had never seen hatred manifested so immensely and certainly not on a 14 year old boy. 

It was here I broke down because the intermingling of the imagery of those smug white Southern callused murders sitting in the court room, mixed with an unrecognizable Emmett Till swollen to the size of the Hulk in his casket, mixed with a party scenarios and women and man indulging in self-gratification and lasciviousness after the parting of the Red Sea, and then images of MY sin and the utter disgust and nasty taste i had in my mouth and scrunched up nose and frowned face you make at the sight or smell of vomit. I was like--- man, we are horrible.  Humankind is horrible. And then, a picture of a blank, clean slate appeared. That was God saying I love you THAT much that I wiped it away. [I WAS BROKEN] And then He says the level of degenerate acts that you see and how moved to tears you were for the injustice that was carried out...that is heartbreaking. 

But guess what, My Son went through that AND so much more...FOR YOU. THAT is how you get to the clean slate. 

[i was broken]

Civil injustice causes a deep stir-up of pain and has us cry out and pull together to work together for a greater good. Emmett Till's mom said that if he dies a hero affecting dramatic change - not just in the South - but all over the world, to know how bad it was and that things need to get better, than what he went though was worth it. 

Praise God...He said where is the same fire of change from My people for Jesus? [BROKEN]  My Son went through that and more...are you tearing up?  Are you crying out?  Are you showing up in bands upon bands of people ready to march, to take a stand, to proclaim MY name, what is right? Does Jesus get the same fanfare and parade?

Where are MY people?

[Broken]

God loves us sooo much, that in our filth, He sent His Son to clean us up, save us from ourselves, our sin, and get spared the indignant wrath of His we rightfully deserve. 

[BROKEN]

He did that for you. He did that for me. He did that for every human being--even the evil ones. And FYI--WE--you, me, every person--evil. Because, at one point, WE were enemies of the cross--against God.  And in the game of life...you are either GOOD or EVIL.

[BROKEN]

Romans 5:8 -- the ultimate Valentine Day message.

Christ Loves us so much that He was obedient, to the Cross understanding the undertaking He was to face...the sin of the world placed upon Him....separation from God the Father and God the Holy Spirit, AND YET, HE DID IT FOR US ALL.

[BROKEN]

No...our chains are broken through Jesus Christ.

So, that is what I went through, processed, saw this morning.

And as I was writing this to you (real time, by-the-way), I hear the question, is that why Alisa and I are being sent to China? For the broken people to know of a Savior Who breaks chains?

Oh, and the best parts of Exodus 34--I almost forgot--God is very clear to Moses about what the renewed covenant outlines. Holy Spirit has me notice that God shares a lot of "do's", not so much in the "don't's". The "dont's" are implied with the observations of what others may try to do to entice you, but God again shares what we are to do. That spoke to me about God's character in how He instructs us on what to DO and obviously gave us the example of how to live with Jesus Christ. This is a stark contract of what some non-believers may think Christianity is--in that it is a list of things you can't do and don't do, when this is a clear example of God telling us what to do in the renewed covenant.

God tells Moses all of this and in v. 27, He tells him to write it down because in accordance with these words that He just shared with him, that was going to be the terms of the covenant, for His people, His possession, His inheritance with these saved sinners (just like you and me). And I am thinking...God gives him these instructions THEN tells him to write it down.  Moses didn't have a physical tape recorder and this is before Jesus came and ascended and shared that God was going to send The Helper (Holy Spirit). God tells him all this stuff AND THEN tells him to write it down. I am thinking this is one of the difference of the Old Testament saints vs New Testament saints in that Old Testament had pockets of time being filled with the Spirit and New Testament Saints have the Holy Spirit live in us.

So that makes sense that in v. 29 til the end of the chapter, Moses would grow after talking with God (I guess it would fade away the more time away from God he was which metaphorically speaks to how brightly our light shines when we walk with Him and the more we stay away or distance ourselves, the dimmer our light is). So without saying a word, the world--just like the people back then--could SEE something different about you because the Light shines through you and you do not even have to try. God shines through you.

Which further makes sense that since the Holy Spirit had not come, that in v. 28, Moses for 40 days and 40 nights rewrites what God said, with the temporary help from God, and with no food and no water being sustained by God. 

From that, I got that He will protect us, sustain us, and should something happen, the people who know us, will also know it was God that performs whatever world-wide miracles from the nations of China to the United States of America and the acts of our worship to our AWESOME God, will enact a new covenant to His people to turn to Him or turn back to Him, through the precious name of Jesus! AMEN!!

WHEW!!! 

And if not China and if not now...whenever that time of place is...local or far...He said on earth. That includes Houston, TX, too. Be ready, Sister! ❤️🙏🏿